heavy weights & dreams : When the love gets deeper so as the pain

Hello!

How did you like my previous update?

The Big Bang fever isn't gone yet but I'm already giving up repeating the stories because all I get was 'Shaddap' or people roll their eyes at me TT

And you know whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!

My skin got infected at my neck and chin area that I can't even go anywhere. Plus, I don't have a maid so I have to do house chores ): I guess, I should be visiting a doctor tomorrow if not , it would spread to my cheek. I swear I didn't even eat any korean food lately . I don't even know why it just become like this.

Just so you know,

I'm allergic to kimchi wtf.

I remember that somebody told me because I keep talking and looking at TOP so I get infected -.- Korean eat kimchi since they're young so yeah. So allergic to everything that is related to kimchi. Sound super stupid right?

And so,

after my business paper 1 . I head out for one of my classmates little birthday dinner.

YOU KNOW WHAT,

I KNOW HOW TO DO THE SECOND PART OF THE PAPER AND I'M THANKING GOD NOW TT

I didn't stupid and my next paper is wednesday, fml.

Outfit of the daaaaay!

TOP forever wtf.

You can't blame me, it was like - just 4 days after the concert.

Simple DIY TOP cartoon tanktop , white cardigan and turquoise flare shorts.

I have 3 colours of that flare shorts -.- Don't ask.

The Cartoon Tank Top wasn't a tank top when I first bought it. I bought it at the concert venue as a tee and it was only 20 bucks. I wanted to buy the big bang one - because they look so adorable in cartoon characters until I saw this two malay girls holding the TOP cartoon one. Plus, it's the last one. I was staring at the both of them and if they drop it, I will definitely grab it and pay although I kiasu - already holding the order one wtf.

So the moment they drop it, I wanted to get it but it was so far so I was shaking Amanda who is happily choosing her own one and ask her grab it for me.

You don't know how violent I can get for this korean boy , lol.

It was first ,

like this.

I really hate the tee shirt design. I am never into tee shirts so actually my tees are countable. Unless it's BOY LONDON then it's a different story, lol.

So,

I decided to alter it myself and make it a tank top.

This was just half way done because the sleeve holes were uneven , fml so I cut it more. It was so big that it could see my bra already. I wanted to make it like a boy tank and wear tube inside but ... yeah. It was still looking fine. I totally love it when the collar of the tee were off. I hate it when those tees surround my neck so I always buy a size bigger or so.

But,

it look pretty nice rigggggghhhhhht?

The cartoon's character hair match with mah shorts! ngeheheh.

Camwhored while waiting for Vita to change -

New contact lens!

I had never look innocent in my life before and definitely white is never my colour but somehow this time, it's the other way round.

I totally love this tanktop!

Do you where I can get these cute tanktops?

We settle off infront of a bistro restaurant infront of Sunway Resort and trust me, that place is really beautiful! I like how the sound of the waterfall and how pretty the lights shine on the water surface. Although it's outdoor, it looks really pretty and calm. Plus, it's not hot either.

Actually the main point is,

it serves good ShiSha.

Don't ask me why I put on such innocent coordinate and end up holding a pipe wtf.

looking fugly but ngeeeh.

Taken by whoever to show the background is pretty.

Can't wait to bring more people to this place. They serve good spaghetti, I sweeaaaar! Although I was kinda bloated that time since I have a late lunch but I have tasted Jacinth's carbonara and wtf, it taste better than italiannies . WHY THE PRICE SO DIFFERENT ONE?!?!

GOT CON .

I swear it taste and look the same like classic carbonara in italiannies and the aglio olio also tasted better because they are really generous with peppers. The italinnies one was so dry! The next time I go, I should try their mushroom soup! I want to try the steak too - I should just try everything wtf.

WAIT,

THEY SERVE GOOD FRENCH FRIES TOO OMGGG T_T

What had I just done to myself TT

P.S -

Sorry for getting out of topic here. Honestly , I acknowledge that I need to go on diet and do something to myself. I mean - I hope that you can see a little results from my effort although it's nothing obvious yet but , I swear I'm actually giving a shit and have been trying to do something about it. Although - it kinda fail but yeah, I will try harder. I don't know how to say this to anyone face to face but it actually triggers my insecurities when people repeat it .

LIKE,

" If you eat, then you fail." or, " I thought you're trying to lose weight." or " Pointless doing all the work if you wanna eat." and the worst one is , " This one damn fattening wei."

Wtf wtf wtf,

You never see me starve myself that I want to die of dizziness when I stand up. Plus, is it wrong to take a break from all this torture. I mean , I know that it's for my own good and stuff but - do you have to remind me that my progress is too slow? It's like pouring salt on the wound, no?

Sometimes I just decide not to visit the restaurant with some of my friends. I mean, what's the point of heading to a place where I had to torture myself to eat something that I don't want to . Even when I pay the bill also I cursing inside. It's so hard to have a good satisfying meal sometimes.

Ah whatever la, I'll just be ugly forever.

I mean like,

it's not like anyone would look at me and widened their eyes and stare at me when they see any changes. Not like they are going to stay some motivating things like, " You look prettier. You look better." -.- Okay, I do get that online but the world wide web is full of lies.

Honestly,

I need friends that know how to make me feel better than worse.

Help me find them.

Okay,

how did I get there.

Toilet break!