How do you feel right now?
Complicated? Mixed Feelings? Feeling Uneasy?
Ah, I actually feel the same. It's the last day of year 2010 today. Look how time actually flies. And today, I finally sit back down and take a look at the pictures I have for this year. I realise that quite a lot of things had happened this year and how different am I from last time till now. I couldn't say that I've change or explain how I change but I know that something in me is different. It sucks to know that it's the last year of high school. It's like telling me that I'm already grown up. I have said that I can't wait to grow up and stuff but then, I kind of regret it. I rely of things too much and I am not ready to stand up alone yet. I feel so uneasy right now and I have no reason for that.
There's a few important things happened to me this year.
I'm not sure about you but it's important to me
My sweet sixteen.
It was overall awesome to celebrate with my new mates and I definitely enjoyed myself. The surprises , the presents and the love they tried hard to deliver to me have paid off. Honestly, I did expect something like Calvin hold the cake and walk towards me. Oh well, dreams are dreams. This reality is just to good to be true. I do not know how to show my gratitude and speak out how I feel face to face infact I feel so pressured about that and I definitely hate talking about my feelings to people even if they're my close friend. It feels weird to me and also, I don't wanna sound dramatic to others. I do feel thankful to each and everyone of them that came to celebrate with me.
The second thing is , the most terrible thing that ever happen.
Just so you know, I was admitted to hospital around July or so for a week. I was forced to lie on the bed for 4 days unless I wanna go toilet. I'm not allow to go out , eat or drink. I undergo all kinds of treatments the doctor can give me and undergo injections for a week straight until I was told to get out of the hospital. My friends made cards for me , they visit me and call me to check whether I'm fine. That's the first time I ever feel so much love. My parents whom is dead worried visits me everyday and even wanna sleep with me in the hospital. I acted like it's fine for me to stayover night alone while inside me, it scares the hell out of me especially during midnight. I keep my laptop on and play the songs. During midnight, the nurse came in and scold me and I was ask to off it if not she's gonna confiscate it. I put the blanket over my head and then close my eyes then go to sleep for exactly a week.
I was asked to wake up at 8am every morning to do check up and asked to get more rest like sleep. I was even force to sleep and not to be given pain killer so that I don't rely on them. It was so pain that I couldn't sleep. Then was injected so that I could straight go to sleep.
Oh well , it's over now.
I was asked to go spore for checking up.
Everything was so chaotic there. We couldn't find the way and stuff and we only visit sentosa. I wasn't allow to the beach, to eat good food and to not go under the sun so much. The singapore trip was a disaster , to be honest.
And after all the bad things, there's finally something good.
I have a date with ze girls at Tenji.
The food was incredibly awesome and we got our stomach actually burst. And we drank alcohol , played truth or dare and see each other's true colours. Everything seems to be so perfect. Oh well, friendship :D
Grocery shopping with classmates.
And the party was ,
THE BOMB :D
Not to forget,
I actually spending quite alot of time on this. I annoyed the tour guide, Micheal like everyday to ask bout the price, the hotel and everything that I should ask. I was so glad that quite alot of people went and I was really glad that the hotel was better than I've expected. Everything there was so great. It really feels different to go with friends and family. I got so bored with family there because I've been there with friends.
I definitely miss the late night alcoholic friends with them and then those omg-i-am-drunk moments although I don't really remember what happen then. I guess I just spill out everything I have kept inside me and I truly hope that it's not something big. The breakfast in Flamingo hotel was so awesome expecially the bread pudding. I missed out the 3rd day breakfast and I moaned about it the whole way back home and I was so mad about people not calling us up.
Ah, memories )':
The one that I spend the most time with .
The one that finally comeback.
The forever brain reader.
I'm so glad that I have a few close one that can actually understand me and read my mind.
You have no idea how much it means to me.
You people (;
The boys that I fell for this year.
See the numbers on their pictures? It's already said there. The name and the group they're from.
Just so you know, he's my forever number one. I've actually like him for four years. He's not that attractive and good looking compared to the other five of them but I do not know why , I like him the most. Sorry, I mean that I love him. His smile , his attitude, his everything. I hope he really can make it to Malaysia soon. Miss him hell lots especially the time when he look into my eyes and say thankyou. Gosh ! :D:D:D:D
Just have a crush on him a few weeks ago. I do not know why too. He seems so adorable to me. He look so humble and obedient and fortunately he is too. After all the videos I watch, I just couldn't stop looking at him. Omg , and my heart stops and look at him for a while. The feeling is amazing.
Nothing much to say ,
He's younger than me by 20days tho. I couldn't stop imagining him calling me Noona :D
I like the way he try hard and I like the way he talk, he act. He's so cute. I do not like him at first but slowly , I take notice of him. His condition is the same like Calvin's (; He's awesome and I'd really wish he would get more attention and shine brighter tho.
Forever dark knight to me. He look so strong as if he can protect the world. And he look so good. And for now although he is quite successful , I truly want him to shine brighter and all his hard work would actually paid off. I can't imagine him carrying bricks around the construction area. I hope what he gets equal to every brick have carried in his hands. He's so good to be true. He's the real man.
Sexy Charisma. You just need to know that he deserve this. To me, he is a very sexy person infact I think he's the definition of sexy. I couldn't stop smiling when he does all the moves, I love it so much.
That sums up my year 2010.
How about yours?
Just remember to enjoy your day today, don't ever waste any minute of it.