Friday, November 20, 2009

There's no exit for me .




I don't think I like face timer / custom timer . Just to hear your laughter : )

Just got kantoi-ed by grandma few hours ago about something I did which everyone assumed that it was bad .Well, what can I do about it since I already got caught but I didn't admit that I did.I kept quiet the whole way and let her finish her scoldings.It seems like I really break her heart alot , heh. Non of my family members mentioned about it after grandma scold , they acted like nothing happened after that so am I and this time, my grandma didn't make me orange juice.I was suppose to feel sad , guilty and sorry but no, non of these feelings occurred me, not at all.I felt so mad when she said she doesn't wanna let me out anymore and do not allow me to the trip that we have planned for so long.I will try to ask my family members to help me to talk to her and if she said no , what can she do about it? I will still go and that time , I need mummy <3

And , I don't get it why a person wanna confront the same person for the same thing over again and again .You just need to say it twice.First, to let them know.Second, to remind them not to do it again.The rest of it depends on that other person whether they wanna take it in or not.Why do you need to spend your whole time confronting him/her about the same thing again and again?Are you too free or what or you have nothing better to do?Why do you need to waste your time on such a person who you already gave up on.Why not just shut the bloody fuck up and walk off from that person life and don't give a shit bout that person?Why must you go to that person everyday to point out their wrong and tell them , hurt their feelings .Too lifeless or what?Friends , we need them to support us not to break us down so get this right.

I feel so screwed up right now .My holiday plans are being disturbed and I really don't like that.To make up for the trip , I need to pretend to be a good girl that obeys everything adults say then sit at home and rot. Fuck , I can't imagine I'm at home every single day and the worst thing is , there will be a distance between me and my friends.I hate to be left out and I don't want to be left out , that's why I will try to make it for every outing to catch up with my friends and now , I couldn't just walk out from the house like I usually do anymore.I need to ask for permission like whatthemotherfuckingchibaitoooooooot , permission? I need to ask and look at them with those puppy eyes and I can only get out from the house when they fucking nod their head and I don't want it to be like that.

Seriously ,
Fuck my life!