Sunday, August 16, 2015

The sunshine in my rainy days.


This is probably one of the rare decent selfie I have. Decent, as in having lighter and minimal make up. Decent as in, no thick eyeliner and dark lipsticks. 

I have a three months long break ever since May. Everytime I have a long break, I will definitely look for something to do. Besides going to the gym which I am always reluctant to, I will look for a part-time job. My family did not force me or want me to work. I always choose to work to feel more productive. I know how it feels like to wake up to nothing. I despite that emptiness wrapping around me, making me feel useless.

So I went for job hunting and decided to do something which I never thought - and probably none of you could imagine.

I worked as a kindergarten teacher.

Yes, you may read that sentence again. 

Recently, I quit because I have a lot of more things to deal with. And there goes my beautiful two months in Cahaya MataKu , a small kindergarten located at USJ20 . 



I first went into the three year old playgroup with the amount of 7 people and came out with 12. I didn't handle them myself alone. I always have someone to help me out which I am blessed. However, it does not affect my enthusiasm towards them.

I am never a morning person, however these babies manage to be the reason of me waking up at 630am every morning. They make me look forward to everyday , to see them. Sometimes, I miss them during the weekends. 

I never understand why some people despite kids. All of them are angels. Perhaps I was lucky enough to get all angels. Or maybe, the three year old does not know how to rebel yet. They are adorable. They are cute. They are so lovable. 


She needed me to help her with her bag. 



Sometimes, they do get out of hand.


And, gets so active that it makes me speechless.


Most of them play with my hair all the them.
( I swear I'll turn bald soon.)


They really do pull and play with my hair. I have free saloon session at times, lol. 
Instead of them being my dolls, I am THEIR doll. 


Sometimes, they make me lunch - with their toys.

Oh well, at least it's prettily presented to me! Credits for the creativity.


They do bring me lunch boxes.

One of my japanese baby asked her parents to make me cute bento boxes like this!
My heart melted. It made me sway.


They are even Hello Kitty cupcakes for everyone!

And I realize that my drawing sucks ;




And a 5 year old.

I am a freaking 21 and a 5 year old draws better than me TT #failx100000


And I got a flower on teacher's day ! 

I never thought that I will be celebrating teachers day in this role, in my life.


Appreciation card with my name on it!



I asked them to look at me, and here we go..

Ignore my bareface. I have never been so proud in a picture like this.


Meet Kamiko, the youngest ,


Yes, I taught her how to smirk. 


I taught them a lot of expressions , which you will never understand. 

It was all on my snapchat.


I taught them about expressing love - to show and to give it all the them.

Alright, I was being selfish and make them fulfil my empty cans of love. 


I taught them how to dance, and pose for pictures like that! haha.


I taught them how to brush my hair when they are playing with my hair, lol.



Well, she succeeded in winking in the end. 



This is Kamiko baby. I can never let her go. She is so cute!


Overly attach to me. 

Look at her innocent smile :( ( GOSH, I MISS THEM)

Two months passed really quick. 
During my last week, I feel so dreadful to go home every single day. I can't believe I am leaving them for good after being so attached to them. Instead of them being overly attached to me, I am mentally depending on them. They are the reason of me holding on, breaking through my bad habits. 

I can't seem to let them go , until now. I miss their everything, even throwing tantrums at me at times. 

They are so beautiful. 

And there is nothing much I can do for them to show how much I appreciate them.

So I pack their favourites into packets to give it to them, making them think that is a party pack. 



A mess for them.


And after an hour of packing, here is the outcome. 

I tie ribbons on it to make it look like a present. They love untying bows. 

And finally, the last day.


And I told them that, I am not coming anymore. This will be the last time I see them. They do look disappointed and throw me huge amount of WHYs .. until the see the pretty party packs, they don't want me anymore.

They chose party packs over me TT

But they are just three year old. They can never lie. Everything they do is from their heart. And I always miss the innocence I see in them. As we grow up, it fades away.



He will grow up to be a heartbreaker. 
Already looking so good since young. 


They are still playing with my hair on the last day. 

Well, it was the last :(



Everytime I look down , this is the scene. 

Can you see the sparkle of innocence in their eyes. 

I cried so badly during the last day. They looked at me , not understanding why. They ask me why I am sad. They also ask me why I cry. And I had to tell them that, I am not coming back anymore. I explained to them and it makes me feel so horrible. I've never so much emotions in one day.

I know that saying goodbye is never easy, but I never thought that it would be so difficult.

I've work before - but this time it's different. 

This time, I am emotionally attached to them. Gosh, they are such angels.


They will forget me in a month time, but I will never forget them.

The memories they gave me are beyond precious. I don't think I can ever get them anywhere else. It was not just an experience, it was a beautiful memory. 

And all I can do now is to wish that they will grow up healthily and happy. I hope that they will always love and hope for each other, just like how I taught them.

teacher Carmen.